One week down

As I type this, I am sitting on my front porch with my wireless laptop in hand. I have just finished an hour of advanced Pilates. Last week I came out here after mypilates workout and lit up. My post-workout cigarettes were always the most satisfying - isn't that sick?? Also last week I got halfway through my smoke and just decided that I was done. Thus ensued the great smoking QUIT of 2005. ;-)

I want to thank each of you who has been so diligent in stopping by the blog to see how my progress (or lack thereof) is going. Even though I am quitting by myself, I am not by myself because each of you check and give advice and encouragement and just pay attention. It means the world to me and believe me - I definitely feel responsible to each of you. It's helping more than you know.

Here are the bad things so far:
1. Jumpiness
2. Shorter fuse than usual
3. Insominia
4. Crying jags
5. Tired tired tired

Here are the things that I thought would bother me and haven't:
1. Giving up that morning cigarette.
2. My overall ability to cope is much better than I thought it would be.
3. I have been around other smokers (while they were smoking) and didn't really crave.

I'm an exercise and diet fanatic. My typical day's food intake is a monstrous organic salad at lunch (lots of stuff on it - it's really quite balanced) and then a litght but nutritious snack at dinner (typically some fruit OR Balance CarbWell OR some pretzels, etc.). I know that doesn't sound like a lot but I have to stick with it for the next month. If I feel conident I can manage my weight I'll make it through this with flying colors.

I work out pretty hard four days a week. As a substitute for smoking, I have also taken to walking in ront of the house when I would have normally gone out for a cigarette. So far so good with that. I also am fortunate in that I gave up snacking over a decade ago. That will help me immeasurably.

FARfetched mentioned "The Boy's" excuse for smoking - that it calmed him. It is true. Valium is calming also - that doesn't mean you should take it. I know that. But there is a concern for me - I'm not a good stress manager. I lose hair from stress, I have panic attacks from stress, I have stress-induced migraines. The exercise helps - but I definitely feel notched-up since I quit. I just hope it's an adjustment and I'll go back to managing stress effectively (more or less) the way I used to. Smoking could kill me - no doubt - but stress will kill me so I have to watch it. It's a chronic thing for me.

So there you have it. I'm pretty calm. I will say also that I was grumping and grouching about being tired... tired... tired... even when I had a good night's sleep. I logged into Quitnet.com and there was my daily tip, asking if I was "feeling tired". Turns out I may have another week of tiredness and mild fatigue but it also said that exercise, even a ten minute walk, really helped mitigate it. I'll put the walks into effect immediately.

So there you have it. One week down. ??? weeks to go! Only God knows. ;-)