Thursday, August 11, 2005

Day 2

Today was a bit more difficult. Let me set the stage a bit.

I took a new job in July of this year. So, I've had the new job for slightly over a month. I really love it. It's a more responsible position than I've previously held and it's at a company that truly has a soul - you aren't just as good as your last meeting, etc. and so forth. At any rate, today and agian tomorrow we have our semi-annual Board meeting. I'm a part of it. It's interesting, frankly, but makes for a long day in a conference room.

Today we started at about 9 and broke at about 5:30. We took regular bio-breaks but no long breaks - it was a long day with a lot of nervous energy piling up. It was also the first day I really felt any withdrawal symptoms.

A few hours after lunch, I got nauseated. Just slightly - like my stomach would kind of turn over every so often and my throat would get tight. Further, I had a dull, persistent headache the whole day. I don't know if those were withdrawal symptoms or not, but I sure felt like poo.

When we finished, as I was heading to my car (I had to shrug off dinner as I felt that poorly) I realized I was kind of absently digging in my purse - I realized in a few moments what it was I sought - my cigarettes. Of course, I don't have any. I readjusted my hand-grope to find my sunglasses (my keys were already in my hand). But I knew in that very moment that I would sell my soul for a cigarette - a nice, long, leisurely-smoked cigarette.

I'll say this. It would have been really easy to go and get one, to bum one even, and no one would have been the wiser. But I didn't. I just lived with that soul-selling urge and the mild nausea and the headache. I'm safely home - it's just before 9pm. The soul-selling urge has receded and the nausea is completely gone. A hint of the headache remains, but that's about it.

I've lived through day #2.

The count:

I have NOT smoked 31 cigarettes. I have saved $6.20.

5 Comments:

At 12:35 AM, Blogger derex said...

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At 9:10 AM, Blogger chantix said...

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At 12:41 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Two of my friends used CHANTIX and lose their menstruation for all time they use. Theres no medicine or pill that takes out your desire to smoke.

 
At 2:15 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am in the middle of Day 2 and it sucks as bad as Day 1. This is not the first time I have quit (7 and then 5 years). Those both ended with ONE bad decision. I SO want to make another bad decision RIGHT NOW. I am making this attempt with just the patch. Wish me luck because I am struggling.

Dave W

 
At 5:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

40 hours without a dip. Tired, dizzy, confused. Slept poorly last night. Counting down the hours until I'm bedtime. Miserable. Ughhh.

 

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